When I really think about it (and I have spent a lot of time thinking about it), I am forced to admit something to myself.
And that is that if I were Haredi, there is no way on G-d's good earth that I would ever join the army.
Which is weird, given that I am staunchly pro-army and pro-Haredim joining the army.
But hear me out:
I lived in the Haredi world for six years! So I know what I'm talking about when I tell you how it really is.
While being haredi is extremely meaningful and purposeful and a really pure and untainted way of life, it's also no walk in the park.
The truth is that it is an extremely insular community, ruled by the gedoilim.
Which means a few things:
1. A Haredi person generally feels very safe in their decisions, because they always consult with their rabbis, who they trust to guide them in the ways of Hashem and His Torah.
2. But for those who step out of line – the consequences are severe. And fear of these consequences keeps many people 'in line'.
So what kind of consequences are we talking about?
Well, everything from your sister not getting a shidduch to your brother being persecuted at school to your parents losing their jobs, or your father losing his chavrusa and best friend or even being excommunicated from your communities.
And if these things are not bad enough, your parents could kick you out of your house and forbid any of your siblings from contacting you again.
AND serving in the IDF yourself, or sending (or allowing) your kid to serve means that your family could face any or all of these consequences.
And that's why I would never do it. I'm just not brave enough to risk my family's happiness.
AM I saying they shouldn't serve? Not at all. I'm just saying that it's not as simple as it seems. It never was.
So, next time you judge, remember what is on the line for them.
